ronin1
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| Joined: | Saturday January 21st, 2006 |
| Location: | S.F. Bay Area, California USA |
| Posts: | 639 |
| Visits: | 7 | | Currently: | married |
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Russian Women on Being Wanted vs. Needed…
Russia is a paradox and the people raised in it can be just as perplexing. When one goes to China you know that you are in a strange foreign land with difference customs and expectations. In Russia, this is not true. Russia is like a mirrored image of the States where everything appears familiar yet is not quite right. With a backward decaying infrastructure and signs on the streets sporting backward letters, you know you're not in Kansas any more, but it’s all so deceiving. After some time it’s easy to filter these aberrations and forget you’re dealing with RW that have a totally different mind-set. This mind-set doesn’t obey the rules of thumb that WM have learned from dating WW.
One thing that is not different is that RW are very keen of what a man says verbally. They will take it to heart and run with it. This is very good if you say the right things and very bad if you say the wrong things.
One such paradox is in the words ‘want’ verse ‘need.’ It may sound like a trivial distinction but can have a great impact with a RW’s internal BS hair-trigger. Typically, an AM wouldn’t woo a woman by saying, “I need you.” Such words are considered weak and needy. It is almost a sure way to turn off AW. Where as exclamation of, “I want you” is infinitely better received as a statement of passionate desire. Such is the West where 'want' driven society supersedes 'need'.
As usual, RW don’t see it this way at all. Russia is a 'need' based society as strongly influenced by its past socialist indoctrinates. Those persons with gratuitous 'wants' are considered selfish or even immoral. Consequently, to say to a RW, “I want you” often can carry a negative connotation. No RW wants an immoral husband that only thinks of himself and not the family. On-the-other-hand, to say, “I need you” is one of the ultimate expressions of passion. Just as saying, “I can’t live without you”, that you are essential for living as the air I breathe or “Without you I will die.”
This is a way to make an impression on a RW, however don’t use these words lightly. For RW, words are meaningless without the action to back it up. Also, using this statement can make you vulnerable to GGGs or opportunists. Be very sure of your RW before spring these words on her. If you are not sure, avoid saying any of the above. Though the Words in Stone say that one should have open and honest communication, it doesn’t mean to spill one’s entrails on the floor for detailed inspection. Sure, one must put their cards on the table since time is of the essence in most cases. Still, if you already won her heart there is no need to step up to the, ”awe and wonder” words.
RoninLast edited on Monday February 25th, 2008 06:36 am by ronin1
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