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Not for Profit Center for Russian, Ukrainian & FSU Bride Info. > Russian Bride Forum: General Discussion Forums > Eye on the Russian Bride Prize... > RW, To Good to be True? No Way! |
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Not for Profit Center for Russian, Ukrainian & FSU Bride Info. > Russian Bride Forum: General Discussion Forums > Eye on the Russian Bride Prize... > RW, To Good to be True? No Way! |
| Moderated by: ronin1 |
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| RW, To Good to be True? No Way! | Rate Topic |
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| Posted: Monday July 21st, 2008 08:21 pm |
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1st Post |
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ronin1 Administrator 
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Russian Women, To Good to be True? It is very common for many Western Men (WM) that are new to this endeavor, to initially come to the belief that Russian Women are too good to be true… that they are the answer to the relationship ills of men. It is easy to arrive at this hasty conclusion considering how almost all Russian marriage/introduction agencies universally portray RW. In this regard, a good case can be made in how traditional Russian Women appear to be the antithesis of the modern WW. RW appear to have all the discarded virtues that WW have shed and more, with none of the drawbacks. Perhaps they are seen as larger than life women. Stereo typical women of a bygone era... that has been extincted for decades. At first glance, this may seem true, however it is indeed not. To be certain, RW present just as many problems in a marriage relationship as with any other WW. I kid you not! In fact, in most cases WM will need to endure and contend with a great deal more than their fair share of difficulties in the first years of marriage (due to RW adjusting with the new culture, society and language). If RW are so problem prone, what makes a RW marriage so great? Look at it this way, all problems and virtues are not created equal in the eyes of men. The problems that most WM encounter with RW can be solved. Russia Women are pragmatic and can be reasoned with provided one takes the time to understand their cultural and personal values (described in the numerous topics in the RWP). Their pragmatic nature lends itself to problems that often have pragmatic solutions. Contrast this with the domestic variety were many of the most troubling problems are emotional ones that can’t be resolved and soak up tons of time and effort. These types of problems hang over a relationship like a dark cloud that hampers any attempt to dispel it. Most RW don't shoulder the heavily conflicted emotional baggage that's derived from growing up in a society where they are erroneously told that women can have it all. Russian Women are for all practical purposes ‘say what they mean and mean what they say’ women. They have an absence of relationship ‘mind game’ playing. They tend to be more straight-forward and forth-coming when it comes to communicating with their husbands. Despite their lack of vocabulary, grammar and huge cultural differences, this is one of the great joys of a RW. No beating around the bush… they will tell it like a black jack across the head. Just think of the years WM have been pleading with their domestic wives as to what the #!%? is going on… only to get the proverbial “you should be able to read my mind!” or “if you don’t know already you won’t understand” response. All the untold wasted time in trying to read a closed book by telepathy. With RW, most arguments (RW discussions) are a means to communicate and are therefore a way to further the bonds with a husband (not nails in the coffin). RW don’t burn up your time to no avail. Perhaps most important are RW’s attitude that intimacy is natural and should be indulged in to maintain a healthy mind and body. Often WM are starved of this sustenance even with a WW relationship or marriage. It would appear that many WW believe that intimacy is in some way not clean, a chore, only for special occasions, only for procreating or a means to manipulate men. Getting them in the ‘mood’ means that everything that day (or week, etc.) has to go perfectly whether those things are or aren’t under a WM’s control. Still, at the end of a seemingly perfect day (or week, etc.) of events one may still hear the dreaded phrase, “I have a headache.” When a RW says this… it's because she really has a headache. Russian Women fulfill WMs’ core desires. These are three examples that come to mind. Even with just 3 such virtues (there are many more) that are lacking in many WW; I will wager that most WM would be willing and happy to be married to RW despite the added up-front transplant difficulties. In the West, where men have been virtually banned from 'having their cake and eating it to', there is still a work-around for this... and it is with traditional RW. Men operate best when not having to lug a monkey on their back and having to strain to ‘read between the lines’ that results in no advantage either way. Men are builders. Without an understandable and readable blueprint, they will always build a relationship in a direction that a WW don’t want go. RW Tend to be followers or true partners and often will go the path that a loving husband clears. Consequently, RW tend to be on the same page with their husbands when it comes to working goals. Again, speaking pragmatically, any successful relationship is based on the individual’s fulfillment of expectations verses the amount of effort to fulfill their partner’s expectations… basic give and take. As WW increase their worth to themselves they often decrease their perceived value to men in some way or another (very few have it all). Consequently, in many WM/WW marriages, the man perceives getting less fulfillment with far more effort. While in WM/RW marriages, the man is getting more fulfillment with the same or less effort (after a couple of years of sorting out her adjustment to a new country). In short, it can be said that WM and RW have values, virtues and strengths that are far more complementary to each other for a successful marriage relationship (barring the other pitfalls I mention in this site, of course). From the ’20s to the ‘90s the cloistered country of Mother Russia had given rise to women with incredible virtues, values and strengths. They are pragmatic, truly open and giving of their soul. The fall of the wall had made them accessible to WM everywhere. Too good to be true? Not at all. Russian Women fulfill those most important desires and expectations of WM. Certainly, there will be more problem areas elsewhere. However, such problems will not dissuade the typical WM from a relationship with a RW since such problems are mostly solvable. This is a rare situation where real men are complementary matched to real women in the most important of characteristics. It is often said, “Don’t sweat the small stuff.” When a couple is truly sailing through life in the same direction, the wrinkles along the way can and are ironed out with no recriminations. It is only when a couple has fundamental incompatibilities that cause the “small stuff” to pointedly arise into the numerous nails in the coffin of a marriage. Regardless of the inherit goodness of WM/RW marriages, they are not meant for all. Like the old classic AAMCO motto, “Pay now or pay more later.” Marriages can fall quickly like a house of cards if one is too greedy, hasty or impatience. Weigh wisely the suitability of your prospective wife, for not all are up to the challenges of a RW relationship. Still, for those that are, it is certainly a slam dunk decision for getting ‘more fulfillment for less’. YMMV. Ronin Last edited on Sunday April 26th, 2009 07:32 am by ronin1 |
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